ma thinks too hard - again.....

Current mood: contemplative

BEWARE - this one's a little lengthy!!!!

it's quite possible that my brain may implode one day due to the many frazzled thoughts that drift in and out of my consciousness

because of the stretching and manipulating I've been doing to my head recently in school - I find my thoughts spiraling out of control at times

and so here I am to spew them forth again, in my traditional manner of random idiosyncratic ramblings

I've been noticing lately how so much of life is interconnected.... I'm taking 5 classes now, and I can't tell you how many times I've had to stop and ask myself why they couldn't all have been combined into just one - it really would make things a lot easier on my schedule

Most of my classes center around communication
Keyboarding - I'm doing it right now to communicate to you all
Fundamentals of Business Computers - well I guess computers are definitely medium of communication
Business English - learning proper gramme will help me to communicate appropriately when I'm working in a stuffy office environment
Interpersonal Communication - duh
Business Culture and Communication - 'nother duh

so since I've mostly been doing a lot of thinking lately, I've been pondering the power of thought and what sort of affect (or is it effect?) or influence it has on communication

how much of what you think actually gets morphed into words?

what is the level of importance placed on those hidden things we keep wrapped in our thoughts and how does that relate to our communication with others?

people often misinterpret actions or even words based on their own perception of what's going on.... in other words, their hidden thoughts and beliefs have had a great impact on their supposed reality

we often grow frustrated or aggravated when our thoughts aren't considered - but how can we when they are mostly hidden?

maybe because we put so much effort forth and spend so much time on our thoughts - we unconsciously expect others to be in some way aware of them?

we live in a culture where we place a high amount of value on our individuality - I wonder what price we pay when it comes to communication when we consider this? how much communication is avoided or cut short due to the fact that who we are communicating with, because of their differences, may not be a part of the reality we have created for ourselves?

why do we limit ourselves so?

our culture has also become highly dependent on technology as our major source of communication - cell phones, web cams and email have replaced land lines, face to face encounters and letter writing - television, iPods and Web sites have replaced plays, concerts and community meetings. Sure, a lot of the things we've essentially replaced are still around and being used by many, but the impact of them has shifted. We have grown bored and impatient with traditional modes of communication and we crave fast, impersonal, and highly visual flashes of information instead of close personal contact that seems to be too intimate and take too long - taking too much away from our busy individualistic lives.

So today on my way home for lunch, as I'm waiting at the bus stop, I start to think. Out of the 7 or so other people waiting in the shelter with me, at least 4 of them are on their cell phones, either texting, checking the Internet or playing games. We are all interconnected, crammed together within the shelter of the bus stop, probably all struggling with the pressures of being in college, and yet we all stay highly distanced from each other. Not one of us thinks to say hello, or spark up a conversation. We all have our own distinct style and personality - I can tell this by the way we look, smell, act - yet we all have things in common that we could build off of with communication. I started thinking about how our culture values individuality and how if I were at a bus stop in another country maybe people would be speaking to one another instead of being glued to their cell phones. People might focus on their similarities instead of their differences. And then, as I'm riding the bus home today I noticed something else related to communication. I was trying to manage my clumsy wheely backpack, my unbuttoned jacket and my purse - we all know how unstable a bus ride can be - so I was in a constant state of juggling trying to make sure the wheely backpack stayed upright, my purse stayed on my lap, and my unbuttoned jacket stayed wrapped snugly around my cold body. As I was gathering my things and readying myself to get off at my stop, there was a man on the bus who started chuckling and said to me that I didn't have to worry, no one was going to steal my stuff. I might add that this man was African American and most likely mistook my shuffling and reorganizing as a sign of fear and worry for the safety of my belongings, he undoubtedly misread my actions as a sign of prejudice being as he was the only person in the back of the bus with me at that time. I chuckled a bit with him and pointed out that I was in fact getting ready to get off the bus and was only trying to gather my things, and/or make sure that my backpack wouldn't go toppling over again (it did so 3 times on this ride when I momentarily let go of it) but I could tell that he had his mind made up, and my explanation to him seemed to be taken as a bit of an excuse. I was a bit taken aback by his comment, and angered a bit that he could have misinterpreted me like that. I am far from being prejudiced and hadn't had a single worry about my property. I realized that all of the unspokens can be very powerful communication methods too. I realized that in order to be truly understood, we must open ourselves up to the world around us and start communicating. Little did this man know that I was thinking deeply on this bus ride- pondering interconnection, communication, and thoughts as I surveyed my fellow riders. Trying to learn more and probe into their highly separate lives, making assumptions and assessments, just as he did to me, based on their appearance and what I thought of it all....

What a trip! (literally AND figuratively)

PS I'm so glad to be back in school and filling my brain with things other than what everyone wants to look like and how they want to be styled - but I can also appreciate how interconnected the whole process really is - no matter how much you learn or know, it all seems to boil back down to what you look like and how you think....
haha
superficiality may be the death of me