New Outlook

Well, I'm trying to have a new outlook on life and find and focus on the things that bring me happiness - the things that I am grateful for... sometimes this task is less than simple and really actually very hard to do - especially when life seems horrid and instead of making lemonade with your lemons you seem only to be creating bitter yellow slime... but anyways, like I said - I'm trying
Today is the first day - but I'm going to try to name 5 things that I'm grateful for everyday
here goes nothin...
1. my beautiful baby boy (well he's not such a baby anymore, and sometimes his foul mood and behavior make him seem not quite beautiful - but I love him and appreciate him daily for how he helps me grow and stretch myself to new limits)
2. my home (even though it's somewhat of a shithole and most of the time there's some sort of drama attached to living in it - I do afterall have a place to call my own I feel lucky and blessed for that, especially when there are so many people in this world who unfortunately have much less than that)
3. my family (even though a lot of the time I feel completely and utterly alone in this world, I know that if I ever really needed something at least one of the 66 people I just added up in my interestingly massive clan of immediate and extended family would have my back and I'm very grateful for that - some people really do have no one, and I consider myself pretty lucky to be a part of something so large and interesting)
4. my strength (I've been down and out on several occasions in my life, but I always find a way to somehow muster up enough strength to get myself though it and keep on forging ahead)
5. the sun (I would be lost with out the light and warmth and life giving energy that the miraculous sun spreads on us all every day... thank you sun for shining down on us, even if I can barely see you through the clouds, I know you're there and helping us all grow)Everyone is emailing and outsource exchange server is the business to be in. Not too many people understands exchange hosting or outlook exchange, but basically what email hosting allows you to do is access your email while you're on the internet.

which is it?

Isle
or
I'll
maybe I'm just a wee bit premenstrual
or maybe
it's something else
why wonder which it is
when it could really be both
I'm filling up fast
and
soon I'll blow

needs and wants

We all have addictions
of one sort or another
things we need
things we want
that keep us going
or
that keep us from stopping
they keep us
in a parade of charades
and
isn't the point of an addiction
to constantly want more
to never feel quite full
guessing and acting
putting on a show
for those that don't know
what our poison(s?) be
riddle me this Batman...
why is it that the physical
rather than the verbal need
takes over
and we're left
searching for clues
and wondering
what the pantomime
is meant to mean
what is it we're left to guess
to fill
the
emptyness
no sounds or lip movement
only silence
empty
movement
and sometimes
u think
u have
a guess

So I'm new to this...

Oh joy I have a blog
hmmmm
and now what do I say?
(I'm a little shy at first - but once you get to know me....)